about 2 months into my new job and positively coping! seems like i'm always getting stressful work environments and very late nights but i'm staying positive. everyday is like fighting a new war so the soldier must brave on. the hospitality environment is very, very challenging so i'd just take each day as it comes! seeing big brands very day also kinda makes me feel a wee bit demoralised, i got no money! :( all my colleagues are clad in giogio armani, lv and chanel and the best i have is zara?! SO MOODY.

i just came back from a short trip to japan with my parents and i love japan! i must go back again soon, though it gets kinda expensive! but the supermarkets are amazing, like an enormous meidi-ya.

i must make it a point to take cabs less often and to lose weight! i'm getting fatter and fatter by the minute :(

meanwhile congrats to the new mummy carine, and hope to see your baby boy soon!

met up with the orchard girls for lunch, which was very worthwhile. although a short hour, it was reviving. by the way, minnies, your loud voice is comforting indeed, feels good to know you're nearby :) "min - heard first then seen." haha. and angel, the omnipresent one whose presence never fails to comfort too.

and we should do the bedroom thing again SOON with the other girls and finish the remainder!

tonight's gonna be a good, good night

everyday should be a good, good day
everyday is a good, good day!

goodness, overwhelm me.

i miss school. miss going to coffee joints early in the morning and hogging the seats till night to study. i even miss going to nus central library to do my neverending readings. can you believe it, for a person who hates exams, i miss studying. i miss writing my notes in all different shades of colours. i miss going to stationery stores to stock up on my collection. i miss using up every drop of ink in the highlighter and throwing the empty pens into the bins, pen after pen. i miss having the occasional afternoon beer at breko/hv while studying. i miss studying alone. i miss writing term papers. i miss doing research.

i'm so nostalgic i suck. i should look FORWARD, damnit.

have been hearing about wedding proposals of late. cliched as it may be, how's a giant billboard proposal down the ecp highway right in singapore?

i want to hold you when you've had a bad day. and please let me, i want to return the favour.

let's be each other's lighthouses in the stormy skies.

actually, at the end of the day, it doesn't matter how much time we have together or how we're spending time together. it just kinda very simply makes me happy just getting to see you. beneath the shields of armour, the simple girl in me can't help but smile when we meet. it beats everything else, even if just for a while, you make me feel better in this mad world.

and that is how simple love can be.

what i really want is to be jobless in october, and go for a holiday for my birthday.

i'm really bad at dealing with problems, all i want to do is escape from them. reality bites, i can so feel myself dwelling into negativity again. it's like quicksand, but i'm struggling to stay afloat.

it's time i took a break. always saying, never realising.

everything's gonna be alright. everything's gonna be alright. keep calm and carry on. hopefully i'd find strength, somehow.

sleepless & troubled

have been troubled over some matters over work and my employment issues. went for a few interviews and am pending reply from a particular company that i would like to work for. at the current place, i am about to embark (again!) on another project, this time all by myself. as the boss says, like an assessment for me as she'd like to offer me a permanent position (but mind you, it's a totally different job scope from what i've been doing, so what the fuck, i say she's just trying to take advantage of me damnit).

so i'm like eagerly awaiting for the the said company to offer me a job hopefully so i can RESIGN from the civil sector. i guess the job scope in the civil sector is pretty okay, but unfortunately i've been in the division which practices micro management and the management styles does not fit me at all, hence my desire to leave asap. SIGH. and this next project i'd be directly under the scary director, can't imagine my life. and it's in about a month's time...how to tender and serve notice...?!

i've this escapist attitude in my worklife, in my previous company too...each time i'm about to start on a new big project i feel threatened. i feel like i haven't made any big mistakes for the 1st project and i'm sure i'll screw up the next kind of mindset, then i choose to escape by resigning...don't know how i'll survive in the corporate world! feel like i've only the stamina and drive to wholly put my heart on only one major project at a time...

the corporate world is no fun. wish me luck.

the ironic motto in life: working to save up to quit working!

it is not about what car you drive. not about someone you know. not about the funds in your wallet. not about the expensive clothes you wear. not about the skin and bones you have. it is about the actions you bring through yourself and the words you mean - the things you do that mean so much to me. like the surprise pecks on my lips when i'm talking to you waiting for a reply, and all you do is lean in to kiss me.

you know how they say about the world spinning and the crowds still flashing by, while at the moment there is just only you and him.

yes i know that feeling exists.

photo credits yourebeautiful@tumblr

credits to yourebeautiful @ tumblr

perhaps all we need is someone for us to lean on during the times you need a shoulder. perhaps all we need is someone who can provide a listening ear during stressful periods. we don't need good-lookers, money-makers, fancy cars or branded suits.

maybe all we need is someone we can totally be ourselves, someone we can lean on, someone we totally trust.

maybe that's all. but you know we can't always have it all.

just saw that there'll be a movie on brave new world, starring leonardo dicaprio, directed by ridley scott. he'll be playing bernard marx, the one who's in love with beta lenina. gotta to wait at least 1 year i guess, but hope it's gonna be good!

tact or tactless?

i'm getting very annoyed with some people. when you need me to do something can you please outrightly tell me instead of beating around the bush? i am not you and you're not me, i would not know what the hell you want me to do unless you TELL me. no need for niceties in the workplace, very wishy-washy culture which i cannot adapt to. this is work, for fuck's sake, just be polite and direct. how am i supposed to know you'd like me to complete everything you mentioned with no timeline, no direction? i cannot read your mind. and really there's no need to be so nee-nee-neh-neh (read: wishy-washy, trying to be nice). it is really annoying.

i kind of miss my manager in my old workplace. very efficient and smart lady who always got things done, and who was quite nice to me! i never feel threatened going out drinking, having dinner with her. here, my current manager is pretty nice but not someone i'd like to spend my personal time with.

++++++ tolerance is key. brew positive energy, lynn, positive energy! +++++++

well, the grass is always greener on the other side... - sing, travis

the hangover (kind of spoiler ahead)



the kind of movie you'd laugh flat out loud, but not something of lasting impression. but it was cleverly amusing i thought, definitely above par of the usual slapstick guy humour. it is 100% entertaining, definitely worth watching. and and bradley cooper is so hot. repeat. bradley cooper is so hot. you know how in a gang of 4 male characters, there must be a nerd, a hottie, an average and a retard. and of course at least one must be single, a playboy, family-oriented, etc.



now bradley cooper plays this hottie who is a teacher and a father with a wife and son. but he's also the wild child teacher. but the fact that his character is a loving dad plays down the wild/playboy factor but ups the so hot and so committed dad! i don't think you'll get me until you watch the movie, so watch it! entertaining from beginning till end!

wedding dance video fever

did you guys watch the latest youtube video, on the wedding dance? this american couple made an entrance with a mass dance of their friends and family, to the chris brown's song 'forever'. it is so damn very cool, totally how a wedding should be - a celebration! beats my idea of having an ideal wedding onboard an airplane anytime! family, friends and wedding couple all enjoying themselves thoroughly, all very sporting and enthusiastic, awesome!

watch the video here!

the time traveller's wife by audrey niffenegger



it is an awesome read. to me, it wasn't the compelling kind, where you'll want to read page after page. but the kind where you'd want to slowly devour each word and taste every feeling the words give you. it is intense, it is moving, it is an unusual love story which is totally unrealistic, but totally relatable to.



A MUST-READ!



"It’s dark now and I am very tired. I love you, always. Time is nothing." - in henry's last letter to clare

the festival is officially over. just took a day off yesterday but still feeling burnt out. in fact i feel worse than during the hurricane of the festival. now it's like down to ground zero. i'm feeling jaded, burnt out and tired, from working life. i'm rather miffed at myself, i have been working for a full year now already, since graduation. and i'm already feeling the brunt of working life, especially disillusioned. i wonder how the older folks made it through years and years of the corporate life. only 1 year and i feel like i cannot take it anymore...!

i can't wait for the contract to end, honestly. it's not so much of the job scope or management that i'm annoyed at (maybe abit), just the nature of working life. i even feel like ending early, knowing that one colleague is tendering and another ending her contract early too. the captivity of negativity! i don't want to work leh, i don't know how to resolve this also, goddamnit la! argh.

when can i find a job i feel satisfaction in...or maybe, how & when can't i not work...?

no. 1 fashion faux pas

intentional black/colourful underwear under white/translucent clothing

the boyf is off to japan for about a week! happy vacationing!

have been veryyyy busy, but come end july i shall be free-er!
note to self & all girlfriends: 1) must go JB 2) must get sloshed, well maybe not 3) must d.r.i.n.k. 4) must lose weight (argh)

anyway, just started playing sims3 last night, so fun. what's new:
- sims can buy own car and drive
- can go shopping around the neighbourhood (and go for spa, manicures, classes)
- and i can't remember.

as we progress into the next stages of life, we learn that we've to learn many other things school did not teach us. we make mistakes and continue the learning curve - i always think mistakes teach us something, so think on the brighter side - every mistake add experience to our lives.

i also learn to manage people, to massage their egos and to be all ears, less mouth. i guess there's a reason why we have 2 ears and a mouth - perhaps to listen/hear more, talk less - we should listen 2x more than what we say, so talk less.

when engaging in the grapevine, try to talk less. and that case, you learn more.

just a glimpse of carine's wedding...14 june 2009

Their big day, shared by hundreds
Their hands, linked by their bond
Their life, from now to ever.


choosing the gowns...

in the morning at the bride's place...

at the solemnisation ceremony...

during the dinner...

many more on facebook to come! had a fun time being one of the jiemeis for the first time.

really really happy for carine, my first girlfriend to get hitched. i'm looking forward to seeing the little one very soon! :)

i guess the lack of entries explains how busy i am! singapore heritagefest'09 is coming in a blink of an eye, so we're really swamped at work! what's probably worth mentioning are the free concerts at vivocity in july - there will be local bands like jack & rai, so keep your eyes peeled!

other than that, i'll also be attending 2 weddings soon, a church reception this saturday and carine's one in june (as you all should already know). this is really making me feel old! and the next phase of life begins...

still managed to squeeze some time in for the tangs private sale with kenneth today, so happy! at least we got something done. on another note, i will have tonnes to do at work, many office late nights, and 'freeze-leave' but i shall take joy in it! after all, you are your only worst enemy :)

whatever life brings you, try to make the best out of it, i guess. better a positive outlook on life than no life to look out upon (this is cheesy). this philosophical mood is getting a tad ott :P

i am going to be a jiemei!!! my virgin jiemei!!! i think. OMG.

i am so happy for my girlfriend, really genuinely sincerely happy. :)

life brings you many nice surprises :)

till details are 'dug up', i shan't reveal more.

*allsmiles and all the love in the world for you and your family!

i am drowned in saccharine goodness, you all know how emotional and excited i can be, so let me be, as if it's my own business...haha.

*shrieks

judging criteria

"Don't judge people who don't look the same as you do. Because you never know. One day it might be all taken away."

- Connie Culp, first woman who received a near-total face transplant, http://news.sg.msn.com/topstories/article.aspx?cp-documentid=3283164

if not, life might just be a waste

a wish to see the wonders of the world, the majestic forms of the world, whether man-made or the works of nature, the giza pyramids, the european ruins, niagara falls, the stone henges, the petra site... everything i will not be to cover, but most i hope to see in real. the sights will be so overwhelming, i think i might be so overcomed with fear of the majestic, but that is a feeling that is non-replicable and can only be felt by oneself.

i wanna go egypt!

saw this off a friend's wall:

''Find that pursuit that will energize you, consume you, that will become an obsession. Each day, you must rise with a restless enthusiasm. If you don't, YOU ARE WORKING.''

and i so totally agree with that. oh my, i'm so not cut out for the corporate world. i hate capitalism because i have no choice but to succumb to it. why must my life be determined by the works of others in society? because we are social beings. how come words can plainly sum up my life. how come i have so many questions.

argh, damn it.

happy easter

in advance to all! ay to a shorter work week - have a good holiday!

a friend to brave the trials of daily life
a buddy to smile with you through the daily blunders
a partner in crime to share the adrenaline
a companion throughout!

the little pink girl with the big blues

it's the little things that add up
much to an overrated scale of a big thing
it's the simple little wants
that build up to a big complex equation
it's as easy as abc
it accumulates as you procrastinate
a theory of pessimism
that keeps you and me going

wonder girls

i want nobody nobody but YOU i want nobody nobody but YOU *clap clap*

to anyone of the blujazz girls (i.e. rach, byue, mabel, may, serene), we should do this again, with the thai girls! *clap clap*

i have been happier and more relaxed of late...because tomorrow marks my last day at my current job! today i sent out my first farewell email to my suppliers and clients with mixed feelings...but mostly happy!

off to greener pastures! risk-taking is sure no feat, but you're young only once, and only once!

happy shiny people

• went for short trip to KL with the bf weekend before last.


• took the train to kranji, hopped on train to larkin. had breakfast at larkin. hopped on coach to KL


• met up with mom and relatives


• went clubbing with cousin and bf


• slept at aunt's house that night


• next morning, took aunty's car to drive to KL from aunty's place in the suburbs


• re-emphasized fact that the bf is a living GPS, and a remarkable driver


• had a mini teeny weeny road trip, drove from suburbs to KL and around and back


• walked alot, had really black m'sian-style hokkien mee, had A&W, had Dunkin' Donuts, basically ATE alot


• walked almost all the malls around KLCC, just the 2 of us


• loved holidaying with bf, nothing to worry, nothing to fret, just walk & follow, eat & drink, carefree and easy


• tried to queue for tickets to Petronas Towers but tickets ran out


• got scolded by bf for still being uptight and hurried during vacation


• hogged the car until wee hours, felt a little ashamed that people at home had to stay up to open the gate for us


• threw a tantrum of some sorts the next day because it was raining, wet and dirty


• bf had to pacify me


• went back by coach on sunday night


• missed life. want to live life. will live life.
  

NEWSFLASH!

i have tendered my resignation! YESSSSSSSS! had a long talk with my asst director, then a brief talk with my MD. after a few days i tendered, the subject was avoided, i didnt want to be too insistent as well...then yesterday my MD finally agreed. he told my colleague 'no choice, if she really wants to leave...' i told him to 'keep the doors open for me' and he was pretty surprised...

i feel very liberated. albeit a little sad, since the people here are pretty nice to me. suddenly felt a rush of emotions when one of my colleagues hugged me today...going to miss the times when we hang out. still have to serve notice till the end of march, though.

right now, career-wise things are still pending, but there goes. i'm going to be a risk-taker, maybe not so wise in these bleak economic times...but i'm not going to have any regrets! i'm young now and young only once!

again: so liberated! :)

2009's goal:

to reach my first $10k by this oct. i am determined to achieve my first goal within the first year of my working life.

in the meantime, i will continue my job hunt...be it actively or not...

a big thank you to aikwee who helped me with the bak-kwa buying! very very grateful!

a happy chinese new year to all in advance! :)

anyone who wants to go for a drink, please call me, i'm so craving for DRINKS!

cny help

anyone going down to lim chee guan to queue for bak kwa? can i "ride" on your trip down, need to order a few hundreds grammes of bak kwa to give SO's family and of course for my own consumption...please sms me if there're any helpful souls!

i should be going down smiling orchid to order as well, if anyone wants to order, perhaps i can help! but collection is another matter...:)

otherwise, is anyone intending to go down to lcg, i'll go with you, don't want to brace those queues alone...:)

many thanks in advance! the kiasu-ness will pay off, cny comes in less than 25 days, must order now!