you know it's love when

he comes down to your place just to have dinner with you,

of course, coupled with these little treats to pull you through insane exam times,




just like that,

he made my day (:


thank you, dbb.

p/s. xnn is sorry she can't be there on your off day! tempted tempted! ANOTHER 4 DAYS. BLARGH.

the willing, destiny guides them; the unwillingly, destiny drags them







funny how some things work
maybe that's how destiny goes
you could be more than something with someone
and never more than that with her
or you could mean so much to him
but hardly enough for you
sometimes you wish for more
but they say
be careful what you wish for
'cos you just may get what you want
other times it's a big burden off your shoulders
you've never felt so good before
and then there are misintentions
coupled with misunderstandings
sometimes they get cleared up
or else it bugs you for abit
before it sort of just stuck in frozen memories
it's there but it doesn't emerge
you don't know its presence
until it resurfaces again
but like regret
it's somehow always there
i guess destiny's funny like that
it brings you round and round
you never know when's the start
or the end
but that's the surprise of life
we don't have to make things happen
they just do.













we lose some, we wreck some, we also win some :)

little miss bimbo


Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.

i read this and lol-ed, because i think i'm absolutely capable of doing this. :P

she's the only one i got

happy birthday, mummy!

i love her because:

1. she understands what i don't say

2. she loves me

3. we can talk and talk and talk and talk throughout the night

4. she still loves me although i'm always yelling

5. simply because she's my mum

:)

a mother loves her children even when they least deserve to be loved.

-kate samperi

i forgot to post

happy 21st birthday to my dear hwan!

i love you.

and to my favourite yangyang who just turned 3!

lovelovelove (:

oh, oh, oh the sweetest thing

i miss having supper.
i miss sleeping.
i miss fighting.
i miss bite fights.
i miss waking early for breakfast@tanglin/tiongbahru/aljunied.
i miss putting toothpaste on your toothbrush.
i miss dvd-ing.
i miss going for spins.
i miss singing.
i miss cooking.
i miss home deliveries.
i miss movies.
i miss shopping.
i miss starbucks.
i miss long bus rides.
i miss playing "rugby".
i miss nua-ing@07143.
i miss watching cable for 3 hours straight.
i miss stealing your itunes into my imod.
i miss boiling point and room raiders and hiphop countdown.
i miss uno, pictionary and scrabble although i always lose.
i miss you.

hurry exams end quick! 3 down 2 to go!

i miss the person who gave me a doraemon magnet last night :)

今天几号？

blah!

it's always times like this when i think of you,
and wonder if you ever thought of me


i whisper your name
just to find the peace
that you always give
it's a storm inside here
i'm not in the best shape anytime near
but i whisper your name
the only word that can keep me sane
i could fall into your arms right now
and run away from this lonely town
i could walk a hundred miles
just to see you tonight
i could carry on this solitary ride
just to be with you tonight.

where's mybee?




so would i be out of line if i said
i miss you
-i miss you, incubus

so very very very very bored with books

no prizes for guessing who bought me this. hee.

it's funny how i (turning 21 this year) still get all excited with cute trinkets like that. is it just me, or all girls? i can't imagine if i were to buy the boyfriend something like a pillow with sylvester on it. but i'll be quite happy if he did present me with a little toy, or something of that sort, you know what i mean. anything counts.

overplayed songs on radio (or is it me who's tuning in to too much radio):

1. because of you - ne-yo

2. glamorous - fergie

3. candyman - christina aguilera

songs that should be played more on radio:

1. all the same - sick puppies

2. home - chris daughtry

3. ruby - kaiser chiefs

4. missing you - alison krauss

5. umbrella - rihanna

And she's everything I ever wanted

And everything I need I talk about her,

I go on and on and on

'Cause she's everything to me

-she's everything, brad paisley

out of the blue

i can never study at home. i do EVERYTHING except study. i am so stupid.

ken: you want to wash the love car together?
me: (bewildered) i thought uncle sends the car for washing one?!

i'm sure i'm so sure it was only a passing remark. i mean, look at my hands. i mean look at me, do i look capable of doing a good job washing -da the lurvve car-? ken will never want to hold a pair of rough, dry, overworked, cuticle-laden hands, will he? haha. that's why he's always the one washing up after dinner at home...since he already mops and irons and he can even wake up earlier before work just to handwash his shirt. i pale in comparison in self-discipline, terribly!

me: i want to try laserquest leh. like very fun. we ask them go play leh.

ken: aiyah you won't play one la. see how la.

i really don't like him sometimes. grr.

oh, did i mention, we went to the arcade (*gasp) last week. we were just wasting time while waiting for the movie to start. this is SO incredible, we've have never been to the arcade to play together! haha. we just stayed there playing the silly games and wasting tokens. but it was quite fun, for a change :)

and i just have to post this with reference to min's latest post about 'sleeping':

we all know it's not the size of the house, size of the room, size of the bed, not the SPACE that matters, it's WHO that shares your space, it's the COMPANY that matters.

and most of the time, you start off with sleeping WITH each other, in each other's arms, but within a minute, both of you "venture" towards your respective sides of the bed and sleep comfortably, with your own bolsters.

haha.

but still so sweet.

to kenneth:
i want an attached bathroom! just in case i forget my towel...*winks

no. 1 procrastinator

i haven't been studying! :( i am just so screwwwwwwed this semester. i have NO CLUE what my 5 modules are about. i'm just courting death. but i don't really bother (do i?) i just want my holidays to come!!! i can't watch spidey3 on its premiere day because of the stupid exams, but i've made a date on the 7th with the S.O. hee.

all things aside (read: fuck the exams), look what ken got me yesterday for the holidays:




1. a clockwork orange
2. the prince (this is not so much for my interest but his)
3. 1984

i'm doing up my reading list for the holidays already, yay! the movie list next, then the drama, then the shopping...and then the overseas trip (i hope!)

and yes, i can't watch to watch phantom in may, the gang, please remember! :)

lalala.

feeling so blessed, back in your corner, i'm back in your zone

to all my friends who's been there for me all this while. i cannot be more grateful. apparently outsiders seem to be the ones who get a clearer picture of what's around them. thank you's going out to all especially angeline, xueting, rachel, min, may, carine, stan, yiwei and everyone else. and of course, my mum, who's all knowing yet choosing to stand back and let me make my own decisions.

thank you.


Don't look no farther
Baby, I'm back
I'm here to cater to you (anything that you want me do i'll do it)
'Cause I'll be your lover (i'll be your lover)
I'll be your best friend
Tell me what I gotta do (tell me what i gotta do and i'll do it)
-baby, i'm back, akon ft. baby bash

a scissors-cut above the rest

we went for dinner at the 'authentic' scissors-cut curry rice around lavender. it was quite okay, except that we had to spend a good 20 minutes searching for a parking lot. little india area is totally danger-prone, there are cars and pedestrians everywhere, literally everywhere. not only are cars filtering out constantly but people are walking on the roads as if there is no traffic. these people are nuts, can't they LOOK? and doesn't mean pedestrians don't have to check your blind spots you know! the traffic conditions are just like geylang, i get all jittery! and you always can't seem to find a lot nearby.

and we tried thefrenchstall recently as well, it was alright, for a change. but don't think we'll go back again. and there's an italian restaurant nearby as well, stiff chilli, think we might just try it the next time. i love all these little-known places tucked away in a corner of the island, that people hardly know about, it gives you the exclusivity and privacy. but the traffic conditions are quite deterring.

and it helps a great deal when you have a partner who's almost like a walking street directory. :)

*fishie pout

Easy To Love You
Shayne Ward

Uncomplicated, you enjoy the simple things
Don’t need no make-up you just wear what nature brings
If you could see what I see you would know you’re beautiful

＊You make it easy to love you every time you smile at me
And it’s so easy to love you girl you shine so naturally
I couldn’t even count them there’s so many ways
You make it easy to love you＊
You can’t hide it, it’s there in everything you do
You don’t see it, and that’s just why I fell for you
If you could see what I see you would know you’re beautiful

You make it easy to love you
If you could see what I see you would no you’re beautiful

"all the muahs and money in the world cannot add up to the love we share"

but it'd be good if you do have all the money in the world, ken. :P

happy 42nd-month.

you know it's real love when:

1. when you eat like yourself in front of him, even if it means finishing 2 ice-cream scoops after having tze char for dinner and still buying chips home to snack

2. when you poke at your cellulite-sensitive areas in front of him, and he laughs

3. when he's the first person you look for when you're happy, sad, confused, or just looking for someone to vent your frustrations on :P

4. when he pokes fun at your thunder thighs and then hugs you

5. when he constantly says you're fat but still buys you candy and chocolate all the time

6. when you've just woken from the other end of the bed and hogged the comforter for the whole night, hair all dishevelled, with odd breath, cloudy eyes, and he still wants to give you the morning kiss

7. when you're YOURSELF in front of him, you know, together with all the weird habits that i rather not mention

8. when he's HIMSELF in front of you, you know, together with all the weird habits i cannot mention :P

9. when you feel all safe and secure just being with him

feel free to add to the list, people!


bee, thank you. :)

for always being so patient.
for tolerating my incessant mood swings. and neverending complaints.
for being there for me all these years, can you believe it, this year will be our 4th year together?! (gosh i feel so old, some people haven't been been married for this long, haha)
for always putting up with my wilfulness.
for letting me have my way all the time.
for being through all my up's and down's.
for showing me how to love.
for letting me love you.

striking resemblance?

kenneth (also known as my significant other) said i look like a stonefish. hmmm.

don't you ever marvel at how small your hands feel when you place them against your boyfriend's? their fingers are like so big and long and look like they can envelope your short stubby fingers in one grip. which then makes you feel all safe :) oh, i know this is so so so cliche, but i still must say it, now we know what the gaps between our fingers are for, haha!

and my heart goes out to all affected by the vtech shootings.

quote of the day:

every satisfied wish makes room for a new one; both are illusions; the one is known to be so, the other not yet. no attained object of desire can give lasting satisfaction, but merely a fleeting gratification.

if only every night and day could be like last night, safe and comfortable.

*ilu, mr easily-victimised (:

baby come back, have a little faith in me

i'm sorry if you're mad at me.
i'm sorry if i ever led you to doubt me.
i'm sorry if i hurt you.
i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry.
i'm sorry i take for granted that you're always there.
you're the one who knows me inside out and i know whatever i do can never escape your eyes.

i still remember that time, i went through your box of things after your ord, and found the notebook you wrote in during your lesson time. at the back of it were pages of what you wanted to tell me, but you never let me see it. so touched to see that, although you had no intention of letting me know.


with everything i've got,
zq, i'm sorry.


Nobody gonna love me better
I must stickwitu forever
Nobody gonna take me higher
I must stickwitu
You know how to 'preciate me
I must stickwitu
My baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way
Im must stickwitu
-stickwitu, pussycat dolls

Butterfly
Mariah Carey

When you love someone so deeply
They become your life
It's easy to succumb to overwhelming fears inside
Blindly I imagined I could
Keep you under glass
Now I understand to hold you
I must open my hands
And watch you rise

Spread your wings and prepare to fly
For you have become a butterfly
Fly abandonedly into the sun
If you should return to me
We truly were meant to be

So spread your wings and fly
ButterflyI have learned that beauty
Has to flourish in the light
Wild horses run unbridled
Or their spirit dies
You have given me the courage
To be all that I can
And truly feel your heart will
Lead you back to me when you're
Ready to land

I can't pretend these tears
Aren't overflowing steadily
I can't prevent this hurt from
Almost overtaking me
But I will stand and say goodbye
For you'll never be mine
Until you know the way it feels to fly

So flutter through the sky
Butterfly
Spread your wings and fly
Butterfly

hug?



click on it to see a clearer version.

so sweet (:

gives a whole new meaning to instant messenging. :)


but you will always be my boo
-my boo, usher

breach is a must-watch

i'm tired but i have to blog about this brilliant movie. i wasn't expecting much when i first saw its trailer because it seemed like one of those usual dry hollywood espionage movies. i thought the script was fantastic, full of clever yet straight-to-the-point dialogue. i was expecting to fall asleep considering that i was watching during the wee hours but i was kept awake throughout. the movie focused on the psychological elements of the individual and his counterparts and also managed to keep its audience engaged in the complexities of the human mind. it played alot on the mind and the audience was mostly all-knowing other than suspense segments. it's like a chunk of mind games being enacted on screen.

the suspense was thrilling, some sort of a cheap thrill, we go like 'omg omg omg will he see him omg' rather frequently during the show and we all heaved a huge sigh of relief later on. you get the picture. Chris Cooper is an incredible actor. it's incredibly intelligent, every line from the dialogue just oozes substance. it's the kind of movie that makes you want to think twice about the lines just delivered and then you realise how much sense it makes. it's like every line has a subtext that makes you want to go deeper into it.

and the aftermath is quite thought-provoking as well, you wonder if the spy finally realised who set him in in the end. you never really know, plus you don't know whether to sympathise with him or not, because his personality is so multi-faceted. that's what's intriguing. you know, it's the kind of movie you know from start till end what will happen ultmately, yet your attention is captured entirely because you want to know how things develop.


satisfying! a good movie or good read simply perks me up!

friday the 13th

the whirlwind comes to a stop eventually

now it's back to enjoying the breeze

hints of you still peek from my heart

bits of you are still everywhere around

but i guess i'll be better

at least i hope i'll be okay

i dig into my bags to clear what might have been you

even songs on radio bring me down memory lane

seems it's all etched inside my mind

i'll learn to survive

after all it's time to wake

finally,

for a good night's sleep.

i'm going home,

back to the place where I belong,

and where your love has always been enough for me.

-home, chris daughtry

how come

me: you think got anyone fantasized about me before?
ken: you mean sexual fantasy ah?
me: yup.
ken: pui! (bursts out in peals of laughter)

about the birthday party...

ken: what to wear ah? the theme is goth leh.
me: i dunno. go as yourself lor.

HAHAHA.

best friends at essential'obrew







the worst thing a guy can do, is make a girl fall for him, with no intention of catching her.

know why it's been raining?

seems every time I try to forget about you, my feelings pull you back in.

-circle, marque houston

giving me a little more time to be here with you

funny...and rather sweet.

quit playing games with my heart

i've got time, just to waste, if you would be my sweet escape

class 95

i can't play the songs - david gates

Looking at your picture lying on my bed
Wishing I was pulling close the real you instead
I don’t know what I said or did
But girl I’m missing you
And I like to hear my music
But there’s nothing I can listen to

Cos I can’t play the songs I used to play because of you
The lonesome feeling start before the intro's halfway thru
Everyone reminds me of the things we used to do together
And I can’t go to places that I used to take you to
Cos everywhere the faces there they all look just like you
Until your heart comes back where it belongs

I can’t play the songs
Everywhere I’m drivin’ I go a different way
I can’t turn on my radio, afraid what they might play
My friends all drive me crazy cause you’re all they ask about
And why I live in silence but they just don’t understand

Without you, I can’t play the songs I used to play because of you
The lonesome feeling start before the intro's halfway thru
No one can replace you cause once I tried
And even when I try to go with someone new
You are so deep in my head
I looked into her eyes but then I say your name instead
Until your heart comes back where it belongs

I can’t play the songs
There’s nothing left that I can do cause I'm so lost in love with you
No where to turn, no place to run
You know you are my only one

I can’t play the songs you used to sing along with me
Cos everyone is always bringin’ back the memory
Until your heart is back where it belongs
I can’t play the songs (won’t you please come back to me)

nasrul asked me what happens when hope fails you, what do you lose?

lose hope i guess. gain a real sense of nothing-ness. hope seems to be the last thing, the core of emotions, the last thing an individual can hold on to, the very intrinsic value of hope being it all and at the same time, it's nothing but hope. we can't see it, it's intangible, but it's so very important for people who hold on to it. i guess when you lose hope, you lose everything, but you gain nothing-ness. how do i find hope back if i lose it? do we continue hoping that we can find hope back? which means we eventually do not lose hope? it's like a beginning, yet it's the end. and then it's neverending. and how do we know what's real? it's subjective to every individual to what's real and what's not, and hope's like reality, it's self-defined.

"you gotta hope that someone is out there for you"

lost in time

mum: why, today so good, never go out?
me: hmm, why leh?
mum: wednesday you never go dancing?
me: today tuesday leh, mummy.

i love this woman, the most wonderful woman.


Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight
Lead me out on the moonlit floor
Lift your open hand
Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance
Silver moon's sparkling
So kiss me
Kiss me down by the broken tree house
Swing me upon its hanging tire
Bring, bring, bring your flowered hat
We'll take the trail marked on your father's map
-kiss me, sixpence none the richer

ignorance is not always bliss

today Jane (a totally fictitious name, but real person) told me that bishan is near bukit panjang (!!!). she wanted to hitch a ride from Sally (also totally fictitious) who was going to bishan, and she could take a bus from bishan to orchard and orchard had a straight bus to bukit panjang. and Jane said it only took about 15 to 20 minutes to reach bp from orchard if she took 700 or 171. for goodness' sake, she was in NUS, clementi and she wanted to go to bishan and then to orchard to get to bukit panjang? imagine the look of disbelief on my face. and the best thing was there were 4 more people with us who had no idea where's where. no offence, but you've staying in singapore forever and you think bishan is near bp? what are you, frog in the well? bukit panjang is near bishan?! you'd need more than 20minutes even you drove!

that is the most ridiculous thing i've heard in a long while.

if it were so simple...



wish you could have listened, but you're hardly even there.

why do people expect so much knowing that they wouldn't get fair returns?

mother mudder mummy

just so random,

i love my mother. ALOT ALOT ALOT.

i love you, mummy.

somebody please come rescue me tonight

don't need your lying smiles

don't need your empty promises

don't need your false touches

don't need your fake sweet nothings

don't need you to hurt me anymore.

don't promise me always, because i know you won't stay that long

how do you do the things you do
why do you say the things you say
and act the other way
if you'd just keep lying
then i will just keep believing
for every lie you sing,
is a line
etched out in my ink
you will make me fall deeper in
and then disappear in a blink


sorry i've been so detached lately
and i can't seem to find what to say
i have all these thoughts inside my mind
all written out on paper and then crushed away
i want to talk to you
but i know you don't have enough time to hear
you won't have enough time to stay
i'll just continue thinking about this
thinking about how to let you know
yet not letting myself tell you how
and we'll all end up just the same as before.

now you know why there's past tense to the verb 'love'.

C is for cookie and that's good enough for me

sometimes me think, what is friend;

and then me say, a friend

is someone to share last cookie with

-cookie monster

got this off min's blog.

we all have our lonely moments...but how come i seem to have more of these moments than anyone else?

i want a teddy to hug like this also. boo. :(

midnight kisses
late-night conversations
cuddling together
cosy car rides
morning phone calls
day-time surprises
peeps at the window
love at the door

now, what's it all about?

girlfriend therapy and bodyshop-ping!

supposed to go birthday shopping with angel today but we ended up at thebodyshop sale *shrieks at suntec convention. we walked around everywhere aimlessly looking for presents until we saw the big banner thebodyshop and we got all excited. we spent almost the whole time there and returned with about $150 worth of bodyshop! it was rather heavy and i had to carry it all the way to vivo from suntec, and all the way around. ken wasn't driving at first but it turned out he managed to get the car and i didn't have to carry the stuff around for long! lovely!

it's quite incredible that this is the 8th year angel and i have known each other. you know you both are friends forever and best friends forever when you can sit in the bus together, feeling all so comfortable without talking. just being there. :)

don't be mad at me when i'm mad at you

it's like this wisp of smoke. in a snuff bottle. the wisp of white smoke is circling upwards in the bottle. circling and circling in a spiral, wanting to get out of the bottle but it can't because it's blocked. but so what if it gets out of the bottle? we can break the bottle but where does it go? into the air? we're struggling to get out of this bubble, but so what if we get out? where do we go?

hold me now, hold me in your arms, hold me tight

let me know i'm yours tonight

even if it's just for tonight