the reason we're too close is because i want you to stay a while longer.

the moment i'm alone, i go insane just thinking about you.


please. just go away.

preoccupied

girl: lying must be your favourite pastime.

boy: doesn't mean you don't believe it means i'm lying.

hmmmm. people only accept the love they think they deserve.


they don't mean it. they never do.

if you think too much, you're bound to get yourself in some kind of unnecessary trouble.

i think i'm almost there. and i think nobody's going to save me.

i keep thinking.

just leave me alone please.

what hurts more is not losing you,
but knowing that you're not fighting to keep me.

OH MY GOODNESS. I AM BORED TO NUTS.

immense boredom

I FEEL SO BORED NOW.

I WANT TO GO OUT.

just like everyone else.

they're all the same
they just like the chase
you or her
it's doesn't matter
you're just part of their game
don't fall for it even if they call your name
but you know you will
because they play it so well
you see the hole in the ground
you know there's bound to be nothing good
still you can't help but peek
it looks like a shimmer
then you look deeper and reach in
that's why people say -
we fall in love.

rachel and i just got too bored in class and we started surfing around...and she found this. and i just had to put this up. can you see what's on the branches? We should have.

mmmm.

it's just a game to you isn't it
you don't really care about me do you
you just like the chase don't you
you didn't mean it when you said
i could borrow your shoulder
i could call you at three and just cry
i didn't even try
because i realised soon enough
all of them were just lies
and more lies
don't say you will when you're about to walk away
don't answer my call when you're already so far gone
but if you ever need a listening ear
i'll still be here.

you know how some pictures make you feel happy and sad at the same time, you know sort of 'evokes' the resigned-ness you have...

just call my name

nothing from you days on end
then thoughts start running wild
in my spinning mind
then i stare out the window
where you waited for me once
just once but i could never forget
nothing from you days on end
then i realise
maybe it's just me
and my wishful thinking
that i'd ever cross your mind
you wouldn't even care
i don't want to be played
in your silly little game
but all you have to do
to get me back
is just call my name.







there comes a point,
i refuse to answer any ringing phone calls
as long as it's not your name on the screen
but i think again
i'll probably never touch my phone again
because you're never going to call.

you've been away too long,
how come the longer you're gone
the more i miss you?

isn't it ironic
when it's staring right at you
you don't even give a damn
and now that it's gone
you want it so badly it hurts
i think he walked right through me
like i was invisible
even if i were to scream his name out loud
till my lungs burst
he wouldn't even hear a sound
'cos he's gone and never coming back
ever.








What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do

-What Hurts The Most, Rascal Flatts

how nice of we could just stay like this forever.

what i learnt in lecture (i only remembered this out of the 39 slides...)

after i read wani's blog, i thought this might just be apt...

sex drive: motivation to seek out and engage in sexual activity; willingness to expend resources to achieve this goal

Note: sex drive is not the same as capacity for sex or enjoyment of sex; it is only the motivation to seek sex

hmm...

he is such a jerk of a father.

I HATE YOU YOU BLOODY ASSHOLE.

BORN JERK.

WHY DO I HAVE SUCH A FA-DA. urgh.

i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you!

nothing's going to change this fact. ever.

spent sleepless nights waiting for you
you never appeared
and if you did all you did was ignore
my already lonely presence
why are you doing this to me
you make me feel more alone than i should
raise and drop my temperature
as and when you like it
and i'm playing along like a thirsty lass
but today i woke up
the first thing i saw was my handphone
with your name in it
i thought i was dreaming
and yes darling
you did it again once again
you got me on the string again
with a snap of your glib fingers
you're telling me you're going now
now that you're gone
will you return quick?

now who's who
have the tables turned
thank you for coming in
and then leave me in
isolation again
you're more than a
milestone
a little more than
i'd like to admit
you're so smart
to leave me this cliffhanger
i don't even like you
but i'm missing you like i do
next you're going to disappear
for a while
and i'm not sure if you'd ever
return anymore
and i'm not sure if i want you to
you should take leave
and just leave.

she will kill her if she thinks of him anymore
and she's dead one too many times already.

and they say, jerks will always be jerks, and jerks always forget to give kit-kats.
but they can never forget about those bloody jerks, can they?

therapy never works, they make you miss him much more later when you snap back into reality, thinking why didn't he look for me when i was busy escaping. he didn't even notice i was gone. and that hurts.

i got to do this still although it's kind of late

thank you

all of you who sent me birthday wishes, you all know who YOU are! :)

diyana, mabel, veron, wani, & the Gang for the incredible stila voucher :)

and the Gang for the CD (i can't emphasise the importance of this more :)

angel, hwan, min, yiwei for the lovely issey miyake fragrance :)

kenneth dear for the fantastic fossil watch and hippie loop bag :)

and of course mom and dad for money money money and cake!

and i can never thank you more.

YOU YOU YOU AND YOU!

carine
maybelline
rachel
samuel

i LOVE all of you.

list of reasons:

1. they are them.
2. they are MY friends.
3. they are THE Gang.
4. they are THE best.
5. they gave me a stila voucher for my birthday.
6. they rock.
7. they made me a cd for my birthday.
7a. i watched it just now.
7b. and i'm still bawling my eyes out.
7c. i miss our times together.
7d. i'm still sniffing.
8. they are out of this world.
9. they are them BUT i still love them (haha!)
10. i don't want to bore readers with my mushy stuff thats why i'm stopping at 10, but trust me, BE JEALOUS 'cos you haven't got them!

summary: next time we can all make CDs for birthdays and save on the pressies! HAHA. so that we can have more petrol money for supper! love you guys to bits. :)

see what my tutee's sister drew. message: xinyi, xintze and lynn riding on a fish.

kids. so lovable. :)

by the way, today my tutee ask me what is 'f-u-c-k'. i said 'bad word'.

kids these days. where the hell do they get exposed to such 'vice' at 7 years old. tsk tsk.

such a nice song

where'd you go - fort minor

Where'd you go?
I miss you so
Seems like its been forever that you've been gone

She said somedays I feel like shit
Somedays I wanna quit and just be normal for a bit
I don't understand why you have to always be gone
I get along but your trips always feel so long
And I find myself trying to stay by the phone
'Cause your voice always helps me to not feel so alone
But I feel like an idiot, working my day around a call
And when I pick up I don't have much to say, so

I want you to know its a little fucked up that
I'm stuck here waiting, at times debatin
Telling you that I've had it with you and your career
Me and the rest of the family here singing
Where'd you go?
I miss you so
Seems like its been forever that you've been gone

Where'd you go?
I miss you so
Seems like its been forever that you've been gone
Please Come back home
You know, the place where you used to live
Used to barbeque with burgers and ribs
Used to have a little party every halloween
with candy by the pile but now
you only stop by every once in a while
Shit
I find myself just filling my time
With anything to keep the thought of you from my mind
I'm doing fine and I'm plannin' to keep it that way
You can call me if you find that you have something to say
And I'll tell you

I want you to know its a little fucked up that
I'm stuck here waiting, at times debating
Telling you that I've had it with you and your career
Me and the rest of the family here singing

Where'd you go?
I miss you so
Seems like its been forever that you've been gone

Where'd you go?
I miss you so
Seems like its been forever that you've been gone
Please Come back home

I want you to know its a little fucked up that
I'm stuck here waiting, no longer debatin'
Tired of sittin and hatin' and making these excuses
For why you're not around, and feeling sorta useless
It seems that one thing has been true all along
You don't really know what you've got till its gone
I guess I've had it with you and your career
When you come back I won't be here and you can sing it

Where'd you go?
I miss you so
Seems like its been forever that you've been gone
Where'd you go?
I miss you so
Seems like its been forever that you've been gone

Please Come back home

she thought she had it all
under her control
but he started being so nice
that he became special
and before you know it
he was tugging at her strings
like a puppet in sync
next he laughed off her affection
while she walked in his direction
now you know,
in this place today
people don't mean what they say.
people don't mean what they say.

funny how she knows it's all crap
that nothing's going to come out of it
that it's all bullshit
and she still falls for it.

unfaithful - rihanna

Story of my life
Searching for the right
But it keeps avoiding me
Sorrow in my soul
'cause it seems that wrong
Really loves my company

He's more than a man
And this is more than love
The reason that the sky is blue
The clouds are rollin' in
Because I'm gone again
And to him I just can't be true

And I know that he knows I'm unfaithful
And it kills him inside
To know that I am happy with some other guy
I can see him dyin'

I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
Everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be...a murderer

I feel it in the air
As I'm doin' my hair
Preparing for another day
A kiss upon my cheek
he's here reluctantly
As if I'm gonna be out late
I say I won't be long
Just hangin' with the girls
A lie I DID'NT have to tell
Because we both know
Where I'm about to go
And we know it very well

'Cause I know that he knows I'm unfaithful
And it kills him inside
To know that I am happy with some other guy
I can see him dyin'

I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
Everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
And I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be...a murderer

Our love ... his trust
I might as well take a gun
And put it to his head
Get it over with
I don't wanna do this...anymore

Oooohhh...anymore

I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
And everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
And I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be...a murderer

nice. nice. nice.

i don't need rose-tinted Prince Charming stuff,
i don't need my knight in shining armour,
i just want someone who makes me smile,
smiles for me,
someone to stay up late with me,
later than the streetlights out there,
talking and laughing ourselves silly,
someone who'd bring me for a spin
in the wee hours in the morning,
walk the park and pluck the dewy leaves
tease me endlessly but all in the name of fun,
dance with me in the rain,
be there when i need him
be with me because he wants to.
i just want you.



have you ever had the urge to push someone against the wall,
and do things you shouldn't even think about?

i bruise easily, so please gentle when you handle me.

knights and princesses, they don't go together.

all i want to do is be myself and let you love me. as i am.

foolish game

you made a maze
and pulled me in
i hate labyrinths
but didn't throw any fits
i thought i was the one
who used you as a map
i was just having my share of fun
in the end i realised
you made me
just another one of your pawn.

don't give me that glib tongue of yours, i'm so blind and foolish, just a girl can be.